The Warm List
Keep forty relationships alive on fifteen minutes a week.
Relationships do not end. They go quiet, and then one day getting in touch would need an explanation. Nothing tells you when that line got crossed.
Contact is the thing that quietly goes to zero, and zero ends a friendship however good the last conversation was. A short message every few months costs almost nothing and stops the awkward point from arriving. It is not a substitute for depth — it is what buys you the chance to go deep again. You need some prompt because the fading is silent: you will not notice who has slipped.
Write the list
People you would genuinely want in your life in five years. Not everyone you know. However many this pace actually supports — for most people that is tens, not hundreds. If it is too long to hold in your head, it is already too long.
Give each one a rhythm, not a date
Monthly, every few months, twice a year. Three tiers is enough. More detail and the whole thing falls over.
Fifteen minutes, once a week
One block. Whoever is overdue gets a short, specific message. Short is the point. A long message raises the cost and kills the habit.
Send something, not nothing
An article, a memory, a question about the thing they mentioned. Checking in with no content is asking for effort dressed up as warmth, and it reads that way.
Go deeper
What the paid version adds to this one.
How to tier the list, including the honest test for who belongs on it
Messages for the four common situations, plus how to restart a cold one
How to run it with no software, which lasts longer than any tool
A weekly pass filmed with a real list and real messages